MOM ARRESTED FOR PIMPING DAUGHTER AT TRAP PARTY

A Montreal mother was arrested over the weekend for pimping out her daughter at a trap party. Promoter Kyle Hyah says he contacted police shortly after the woman and her daughter arrived at his event. “I had heard rumours about this lady renting her daughter out at trap parties, and I was furious that nothing had been done about it,” says Kyle. “I don’t usually throw trap events. I’m more of a happy hardcore guy, which is perhaps the most nuance and aesthetically developed music genre in existence. Anyways, since the trap community refused to put a stop to this mother’s abuse, I organized a party knowing she’d attend it so that I could call the cops on her once she showed up.”

Kyle’s actions are being praised by many trap fans, however he’s made lifelong enemies of several of Montreal’s trap promoters. Chad Jenkins, who has has thrown dozens of trap events over the last two years, says that snitches deserve stitches. “That moron Kyle went and ruined a good thing,” says Chad. “Prostitution shouldn’t be crime. Besides, if it wasn’t the mama pimping her out, it’d be some thug. Kyle didn’t save that girl from a life of whoring, he just ensured she’ll be working with someone who won’t be as gentle as her mama. Worst of all, now the trap community has one less thot at its events. That’s a damn shame and it’s all Kyle’s fault.”

Kyle doesn’t care about the enmity he’s earned. “I really hope the daughter doesn’t return to a life of prostitution, but if she does, I’ll just have to catch her next pimp the way I caught her mom.”