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Saturday March 5th, 2016

Half a dozen clubs in Montreal have agreed to phase out dancing in order to make way for anal sex circles. “We want to help our customers really get to know each other,” says Fonzo Faroush, the president of The Montreal Club Guild, an organization that represents over fifty of the city’s largest night life hang outs. “We’ll be introducing the anal sex circle to six clubs with intention of expanding the practice until all fifty of our locations have replaced dancing with it.”

Fonzo says that anal sex circles are just like dancing, but a lot more fun. “Women can take part too, all they need to do is bring a strap on to the club to join in,” says Fonzo. “So it’s not a practice that discriminates against people based on their gender.”

Anal sex circles have grown in popularity over the last three years, as dozens of clubs across North America have begun opening their dance floors to the practice. “Soon, we won’t even call them dance floors,” says Fonzo. “They’ll be anal sex circle floors. It’s going to be wild. Just imagine, a few years from now, no matter which club you go to, everyone will be right there thrusting their hips against each other in one giant happy circle, grinding against each other in the most intimate matter. That’s community, right there. That’s the future.”
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