Montreal police have taken 24 year old Erik Peterson into custody after they received numerous anonymous tips that he had sown his girlfriend's mouth shut. Naomi Pola, Erik's 21 year old victim, was taken to the hospital where she received emergency care.

"This was an incredibly upsetting case," says Sgt. Laughtner. "When we arrived at Mr. Peterson's apartment, he wouldn't let us in. We had to break his door down with a battering ram. Upon entering the premises, we discovered Ms. Pola cowering in the corner of Mr. Peterson's living room. Her hands bound and her mouth was sown shut with a black thread. It wasn't a pretty sight."

Erik, who is currently out on bail, said it was an act of self-defence. "We were heading home from this amazing skweee event when Naomi started nagging me about my taste in music," says Erik. "I love skweee music. No one disses skweee. And that's what she was doing. And she wouldn't shut up, even though I asked her to let it go."

After the couple returned to the apartment, their argument intensified. "Naomi really doesn't like skweee music. Which is fine, but she just wouldn't shut up about how awful she thought the party was," says Erik. "Well, my momma said if you can't say anything nice, you shouldn't say anything at all. So I punched Naomi in the face, tied up her hands, and sowed her mouth shut. And then I made her listen to all my skweee albums."

The police were notified after Erik posted pictures of his handiwork to Facebook. "In retrospect, maybe that wasn't a great idea," says Erik. "I really shouldn't have posted those pictures of Naomi's mouth sown shut on the internet. That was a mistake."

Naomi is expected to make a full recovery.