Several people witnessed an outlandish spectacle this Friday at one of our city's finest night clubs. The brouhaha all started with a man clad in a track suit dancing by himself to some drumstep. The more he danced, the more excited he became, until he had pitched a tent right there on the dance floor. Instead of being embarrassed by his hard to miss erection, he was proud of his chubby, and used one hand to point at his pocket rocket, and the other to call out to his friends to come bust a move with him.

The two men, who up until this point had been drinking quietly at a table, actually took their buddy up on his salacious offer. Like him, they were wearing light material that made erections hard to ignore, and within minutes of dancing, they too were sporting wood. You now had three men wearing sweat pants and equipped with hard-ons dancing like those imbeciles from A Night At the Roxbury. The folks who saw what was going on were too shocked to say anything at first, but this quickly changed when the three men attempted to grind with some ladies who had not yet seen the stiff tentigos of their would-be suitors.

A large and burly man plowed into the trio shortly after their grinding attempt, pushing them off the dance floor. While this was going on, a group of women had alerted a bouncer about the creepy dancers, and the boys were promptly booted out of the club, where they are now banned from ever entering the place for life.