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Thursday September 13th, 2018

Health professionals are incredibly concerned over the growing popularity of vagina snacking among young women.“Storing food in your vagina in order to eat it later in the day is not sanitary,” says Dr. Corey Leonor. “When you put an apple or an orange in your vagina, you’re not only covering your food in all sorts of bodily fluids, your also introducing germs and bacteria into your body that really have no place being in it. And if you go through with eating your vaginal snack, you’re stomach is going to hate you for it.”

The vaginal snacking craze started, like many other terrible ideas, on Tumblr. “Several years ago, members of that website’s thriving shoplifting subculture began circulating vaginal smuggling techniques,” says Dr. Rachel Fou, a digital humanities researcher. “Eventually some of the young female shoplifters who use Tumblr began sharing stories about how they would eat the fruit that they had smuggled out of grocery stores in their vaginas. It wasn’t long before these vaginal fruit smuggling stories started showing up on other parts of Tumblr, and from there they found their way to other websites like Twitter and Youtube. During this memetic migration to the wider internet, the practice of vaginal fruit smuggling evolved into the practice of pure vaginal snacking. Shoplifters were no longer the only women eating fruits that they had tucked away in their bodily orifices. Now all sorts of women were getting in on the act. ”

It’s gotten so bad, that schools across the country have begun disciplining students who hide food where the sun doesn’t shine. “We’re really trying to communicate to teenagers that this fad isn’t just disgusting, it’s actually bad for your health,” says Principal Paul Mangepum of Saskatoon’s St-Dorothy High School. “I know that in progressive times like ours it might seem retrograde to punish women for practicing bodily autonomy, but it’s a public health issue. We don’t want these girls getting sick.”
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