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Like Us!
Thursday March 5th, 2015
MOM EMOTIONALLY DEVASTATED AFTER SONS STAB EACH OTHER AT RAVE
FEATURED ARTICLE



40 year old Lanny Smith was out raving with her two sons when tragedy struck. “Matty stabbed Mike after they got into an argument over the musical talents of Steve Aoki,” says Lanny. “They’ve always been such competitive boys, and they take their musical preferences so seriously, but I never thought they’d stab each other over it."

Lanny says she’s been raving with her sons ever since they were old enough to hold a pair of glowsticks. “It’s been this long tradition, ever week we’d go raving. We’d drop some MDMA, snort some cocaine, make-out, and dance like no one was watching."

Many ravers aren’t surprised about the stabbing, saying that the entire Smith clan was a little crazy. “Parents who rave with their children are weird,” says party promote West Banner. “Party parents who make out with their adult children are twice as weird. Those who do so in public are beyond weird."

Lanny says it was all in good fun. “We viewed life as an act of performance art, we were always trying to push the boundaries of morally acceptable behaviour in order to comment on the emptiness of every day life. It was our way of giving society the middle finger. Matty and Mike stabbing each other was their last creative act, a tribute to how meaningless it is to care so much about musical genres, which are, at their heart, symbols of consumerist society, little tokens of status we use to adorn the hollow husks of our corporeal being."

Some art critics agree with Lanny. “If you accept Lanny’s antics as if she were earnest about them, then they’re disturbing,” says art historian Bernie Shaw. “If, however, you view them as ironic commentaries on the state of bourgeois capitalist society, they’re hilarious. One day, the death of Matty and Mike Smith will be considered the Mona Lisa of performance art."

Lanny hopes so. “I hope their tribute to the meaninglessness of capitalist society serves a purpose,” says Lanny. “I really do."

What do you think? Is making out with your mom and then stabbing your brother a courageous critique of capitalist society? Is raving with your parents a great way to rebel against social norms? Let us know!
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