ELEVATOR RAVES FRUSTRATE THE RICH AS CLASS WAR COMES TO MONTREAL
Ravers are taking over Montreal’s elevators, one over-priced skyrise at a time. “People are using twitter and Facebook to organize flash mobs in luxury apartment buildings,” says Gerald Caldwell, a raveologist at the Montreal Institute for Urban Studies. “Dozens of teenagers secretly infiltrate buildings, choose an elevator, than every floor a few of them will get on, until by the time they reach the top of the building, you have a full blown party going on in there.”
And these parties come equipped. “We bring speakers, DJ equipment, disco balls, strobe lights, smoke machines, everything you can think of,” says flash mob organized Lisa Lunderhead. “We’re serious about our elevator parties.”
The elevator raiding ravers are constantly hunting for apartment buildings with large, luxurious elevators. “We’re not throwing our events in tiny little piss pot elevators, the kind that can only fit a handful of people” says Lisa. “We’re throwing them in the ridiculously, comically large elevators that some high end complexes come equipped with. These elevators can fit over a hundred people, some of them have chandeliers on the ceilings and rugs made of baby seal fur on the floor. You have to see these elevators to believe how wasteful they are. Our parties are part class war, part mindless fun. One thing’s for sure, none of us feel guilty for invading these buildings.”
The rich inhabitants of these sky rises are less than impressed with the antics of these rave invaders. “Important people pay good money so that they don’t have to deal with the common riffraff,” says Earnest Goodfellow Jr., who owns several dozen Montreal sky rises. “It’s an affront to common decency and good breading. Poor people should throw their parties in places that are far away from the important parts of society. Leave the rich alone. We’re better than you for a reason.”
Lisa says she has no plans on stopping her elevator parties. “And i’m not the only one throwing them,” says the rebellious party organizer. “I think it’s odious that there are elevators in Montreal that are nicer than some apartments. By throwing underground raves in these elevators, we’re sending a message to society."