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Thursday August 7th, 2014
ARE TRAMPOLINE RAVES A BAD IDEA?



An alliance of Montreal doctors have raised serious concerns about the safety of trampoline raves, indoor parties that take place on large trampolines that are the size of a hockey ring . “We want to warn our fellow citizens about the dangers inherent in raving on a giant, massive trampoline,” says Dr. Ruby Goldman. “I think it’s a miracle that no one who has attended one of these parties has broken a neck yet. It’s only a matter of time before that happens. Dancing on a trampoline for hours on end while drugged out of your mind is a bad idea.”

Trampoline rave promoter Jeff Bisou disagrees. “I think these doctors are overreacting,” says Jeff. “We take every precaution to ensure the safety of our customers. There’s a reason why no one has been hurt at one of our parties, and that’s because we’re serious about making sure nothing goes wrong. Yes, some of our customers are high on drugs. Yes, some of them are dehydrated. And yes, they are in fact dancing on a giant trampoline, but you know what? It’s fun, and we firmly believe that if it’s fun, it’s safe.”

World renowned safety expert Pierre Falardeau also believes that the doctors are overreacting. “I have spent decades studying safety,” says Pierre. “And I want to assure Montrealers that dancing on a giant trampoline while high on drugs isn't just safe, it’s a total blast. Everyone should try it at least once.”

Dr. Ruby Goldman isn't convinced. “I think Pierre has lost his wits if he’s telling people that trampoline raves are safe. You can't mix drugs, loud music, and acrobatics and expect things to go well for very long. Sooner or later, someone attending one of these trampoline raves is going to die. The government needs to step in and pass laws making these kind of parties illegal.”
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