Index - About Us Register - Login
Article Listings
Newest Articles
All Articles
Monthly View
2019 April
2019 February
2019 January
2018 December
2018 November
2018 September
2018 August
2018 July
2018 June
2018 May
2017 October
2017 September
2017 August
2017 July
2017 January
2016 May
2016 April
2016 March
2016 February
2016 January
2015 December
2015 November
2015 October
2015 September
2015 August
2015 July
2015 June
2015 May
2015 April
2015 March
2015 January
2014 September
2014 August
2014 July
2014 June
2014 May
2014 April
2013 November
2013 October
2013 June
2013 May
2013 April
2013 March
2013 February
2013 January
2012 November
2012 October
2012 September
2012 August
2012 June
2011 December
2011 November
2011 August
2011 July
2010 December
2010 November
2010 October
Like Us!
Tuesday April 15th, 2014

Montreal retailers have never seen anything like it. “Yesterday, hundreds of ravers showed up at my store and bought all my mirrors,” says Home Réno manager Rupert Lachance. “Every last one of them! I had over five hundred mirrors in stock on Saturday. Today, I’m all out.”

Rupert Lachance isn’t the only retailer who has seen a run on mirrors. “Stores across Montreal are being invaded by ravers looking for mirrors,” says crypto-zoologist Henry Clay. “And that’s because ravers are increasingly baffled by the fact that they still exist. They’re buying mirrors because they need to constantly remind themselves that they do, in fact, exist.”

Henry Clay has spent decades studying purportedly mythical creatures. “Ravers have a lot in common with chupacabras and big foots,” says Henry. “No one believes that they’re real. If no one sees a raver, does the raver exist? If a raver were to scream in the middle of a forest, but no one was there to hear him, would he make a sound?”

Happy Hardcore enthusiast Alice Brown has covered her entire apartment in mirrors in an effort to win her existential war. “I have wall to wall mirroring in my flat,” says Alice. “Everywhere I go, people tell me that raving is dead. But I’m a raver, and I exist, so they have to be wrong. Sometimes, though, i’m just overwhelmed by the possibility that they’re right. Maybe raving really is dead, and so am I. Maybe I’m like that ghost played by Bruce Willis in the Sixth Sense, the one who’s dead but doesn’t realize it. That’s why i need all these mirrors, they keep me grounded. They remind me that I’m real. I exist. I know I do.”

Marc Duval, who is the head of the Montreal Skeptic’s Society, disagrees. “Ravers aren’t real,” says Marc. “Buying mirrors won't change that.”
Contact Us | Copyright (c) 2024 Rave News