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Monday June 17th, 2013
RAPING BABIES DOESN'T CURE AIDS SAYS LOCAL DOCTOR



Shockwaves have rippled throughout Canada after the brutal rape of a seven month old boy by a group of three party promoters from Verdun. The horrifying act has thrown a spotlight on sex abuse in Montreal's party scene, which has battled countless controversies over the years, though none quite as horrifying as this one.

"Every day, infants across Montreal are sexually assaulted by ravers," says Dr. Edison, a clinical psychologist at the Hebrew Specific Medical Center. "Many of these assaults are the result of a superstitious belief held by many of Montreal's young men. These men believe that they can cure themselves of sexually transmitted diseases by raping babies. This delusion stems from something psychologists call 'sympathetic magic', the belief that one object can impart its properties on another object by mere contact. The sympathetic magic fallacy is why these young men believe that a sexually pure baby can cure an adult of sexual diseases through genital contact. If you've ever had a lucky number or owned a lucky rabbit foot, you've been victim of this same delusion. The difference is, ravers have taken sympathetic magic to a terrifying level. It's one thing to think owning a dead rabbit's foot makes you lucky, it's another to think raping a baby will make you healthy again."

The three promoters, who all have aids, told police that they read on the internet that they could cure their condition by having sex with a baby. "The internet isn't entirely to blame for this," says Dr. Edison. "Child rape is a horrifying folklore remedy in many parts of the world where the internet isn't even available. The problem isn't that the internet put these ideas into the heads of these men. The problem is that these men were stupid enough to entertain these ideas in the first place."

Dr. Edison believes that only education can prevent ravers from raping babies. "Our society needs to wage war on superstition. A society that tolerates magical thinking is a society that deserves what it gets. If we want ravers to stop raping babies, then we need to teach ravers to be self-aware and capable of critical thought. You have to be a real idiot to think that raping a baby will cure you of aids. It won't."
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